My sister and I were estranged for several years due to a dispute over the care of our elderly parents. (Sister wanted expenses for their care to be reduced so that their estate would be larger; I felt that their funds should expended for their well-being.) After our parents’ deaths, my sister began to regret our estrangement. She asked me if we might reconcile and I agreed. Our contact was largely by telephone, as we lived in distant cities. Long story short, my sister and I talked almost nightly, as she was frequently lonely. While she sadly took her own life many years later, I am tremendously grateful that she reached out to me and that we resumed our relationship.

My advice to family members who are estranged:
-If abuse, endangerment, or criminal behavior are not factors, consider reconciliation, at least to some degree.
-Think ahead to your or the other person’s death: if one of you were gone, would you regret the estrangement?
-If you do not want a close relationship with the person from whom you have been estranged, that is your privilege. But consider whether an occasional or long distance relationship might be viable.
-If the reason for the estrangement has been forgotten or was petty, I strongly suggest an attempt at reconciliation.